It’s a common occurrence. Whether it’s during a conversation between two Newfies at a bar in Edmonton, a heart-to-heart between two friends on Skype or as a final testament to your boss in Toronto before heading back to the condo to begin preparations for the move ‘back home’ you will hear the same refrain. Its such a common utterance it should be on a tshirt. The phrase is “But all my friends and family are back home…”

The question is not why do we feel such an attachment to a place where everyone we love lives, but rather why do we feel shame, guilt and regret when we say it? Just listen for a moment when you hear it. The speaker, usually a person who would describe themselves as a proud Newfoundlander, has a tinge of embarrassment in their voice. They are ashamed to tell the other person, who often themselves are a Newfoundlander, that despite the nice job, easy access to entertainment and full social calendar they want to be around the people they love. They want to hold their nieces, they want their mother to hold their child or they just want to be apart of the lives of everyone they have always known. They no longer want to be afloat in a sea of unfamiliar faces.

Is the hesitance because we feel these pangs of guilt are the worries of children? Do we feel ‘foolish’ for basing our life on family and friends? Have we reached a place in our culture where our programming tells us the good job, big arenas and rush hour traffic are the aspirational goals of our existence? There is the very real possibility of a materialistic culture sinking into our psyche and the idea that what we own and where we own it is more important than who we own it with. However, the fact that we still come back ‘home’ should show that we are not a people who actually feel this way, only a people who think we should. A more obvious example is our wonderful world of Facebook. For better or for worse Facebook is a projection of ourselves. Whether conscious or subconscious, people post a mix on Facebook of what really is them and what they want others to perceive as them. Regardless of whether intentional or not, except for the scattered person who posts nothing but pics of their Mustang, the majority of us fill our Facebook with pictures of family and friends. The endless posts of gratitude towards our loved ones, pictures of our kids and the sharing of information about the ‘Rock’ should go a long way in indicating who we really are and who we want to be. We want to be people who do right by our community and our family. We want to be Newfoundlanders.

As a culture we have persevered through hardships at numerous points in our existence. From surviving the ruthless laws imposed by the early merchants, bleeding in wars not of our creation and rebuilding our modern mentality after a horrendous collapse of our biggest natural resource we have proven we can survive and flourish through anything. This success has always been a direct result of our willingness to help and support each other. In a Darwinian manner this has bred a people of the people – a people who have instilled in them the need and desire to help those around them and keep their family at their side. This is not a trait to be ashamed of this is a trait to be proud of! In a world where people feel more and more disconnected from everything outside the confines of their front door we have been blessed with the ability to walk outside our door and see a land that our entire family tree has seen as well. Although sometimes it can be hard to always have mom “dropping in for a cup of tea” could we ever picture a life where she only saw us at Christmas? Of course not! Although a people born of cod we could easily be more likened to the salmon who always return to spawn.

So I pose to you this: As a people going forward ,whether living in Trinity Bay or shopping on 16th Avenue, when we speak of why we want to go home lets try a different approach. Lets speak of our desire to be around our loved ones with pride and acknowledge the materialism with shame regardless of the life we choose. When we explain to others why we are transferring back to Newfoundland lets be sure to emphasize that although Vancouver is great everything we cherish is in Newfoundland. And when we explain to others why we are staying in London lets be sure to acknowledge that, regretfully, we enjoy the opportunities provided to us living there DESPITE the fact that our family is in Newfoundland. Lets acknowledge that our strength is the people and our desire to be with them at whatever price must be paid. We stay on the ‘Rock’ because we must – and we are proud of it! #IAMNEWFOUNDLAND

#IAMNEWFOUNDLAND: Defining The Self Image of the Modern Newfoundlander is a weekly blog, with a new article every Wednesday, that focuses on the modern Newfoundland experience and how we interpret it into the greater tapestry of our Self Image as a people and a culture. Visit our blog on our website (www.iamnewfoundland.com), Facebook or Twitter (@IAmNewfoundland)

admin